welcome home!

so i got the best welcome home today after work (well besides the ever present smooches and tail wagging from you know who).. my most favorite sunshine girl had sent me a care package! it was awesome! THANK YOU!!! it made me feel so good that she thought of me (and my feet!). here are all of the wonderful things.. including a bag of the most fantastic, best candy ever made on this planet- the york peppermint patty. pure perfection! and the best card on top of all that :) love the drawings - thats coming with me next week.

here i am soaking the tooties!! heaven!! (yes thats a cooler i'm using. we're lacking in the spa accessories and our omaha steaks order came in that today..)

this all was much needed after my first 5 hour + brick today. up at 445 to start. with the moon still out.. crazy. it went ok. i still need to work a little on my nutrition though. and the run off the bike can always get better.

back in the saddle - giddy'up!

so the best thing it to put sunday behind me and move on. I've built the bridge and I'm over it. though i will say i learned a few things from it, and isnt that what this is all about?
i learned how not to change a tire. and that checking to make sure the tubing is not caught up in the tire, even in the midst of a race is a a step not to be glazed over.
i learned that i love this sport and competing more than i realized. i didnt think it would affect me so much to miss a race. but it did.
i learned that its important to cheer for the other competitors even when you are done for the day.
i learned that i have the best support group of friends and family who really care about me and want to do everything they can to help.(dogs included! ha ha. they came and sat with me the whole rest of the day :) )
i learned that in the whole scheme of things one day does not matter. race day or training day, there will always be another.
i learned that i still have a lot to learn about this sport, both mechanically and mentally.

DNF

2 flats less than 2 miles in. i sat on the side of the road and cried. then walked back to the start and cried most of the way home to NC. a very disappointing day to say the least. my swim had gone very well and i was feeling great. SUCKS!

maybe i can..

i had a great run and bike last night. and when i say great i mean that i'm ranking it up there with maybe the best of the summer. on a day when i was supposed to (shhhh!) go easy with some pick ups in order to get ready for racing on sunday, i found myself - along with my new running partner- in the midst of a tempo run. its kind of like those unspoken times when the pace just some how picks up and picks up.. and out of no where you are running. anyway the bottom line is we averaged about 7ish min miles for more than 45 minutes. so for me thats excellent. thats me breaking thru the barriers i have in my mind of how fast i can go and for how long. how much my legs can take and how much my head can stay out of it. i needed this run. i needed to see that i can do this. i can run fast and feel ok and feel strong and not crumble and blow up. and the bike afterwards felt good. strong and smooth. have i said i love my bike lately> its like it was made for me. (ok so they kind of all are since we get them fitted and all) but well... anyway it just gives me some confidence going into the race on sunday that maybe some of the dust is gone and i've cracked into something good.

skinny legs? nope STRONG legs...

an article by Kristin Armstong.. (thanks court!)
Pretty Strong
Feeling comfortable in our skin isn't always easy. Running helps

A few months ago on a school morning, as I attempted to etch a straight midline part on the back of my wiggling daughter's soon-to-be-ponytailed blond head, I reminded her that it was chilly outside and she needed to grab a sweater.

"No, mama."

"Excuse me?"

"No, I don't want to wear that sweater, it makes me look fat."

"What?!" My comb clattered to the bathroom floor. "Fat?! What do you know about fat? You're 5 years old! You are definitely not fat. God made you just right. Now get your sweater."

She scampered off, and I wearily leaned against the counter and let out a long, sad sigh. It has begun. I thought I had a few more years before my twin daughters picked up the modern day f-word. I have admittedly had my own seasons of unwarranted, psychotic Slim-Fasting and have looked erroneously to the scale to give me a measurement of myself. But these departures from my character were in my 20s, before the balancing hand of motherhood met the grounding grip of running. Once I learned what it meant to push myself, I lost all taste for depriving myself. I want to grow into more of a woman, not find ways to whittle myself down to less.

The way I see it, the only way to run counter to our toxic image-centric society is to literally run by example. I can't tell my daughters that beauty is an incidental side effect of living your passion rather than an adherence to socially prescribed standards. I can't tell my son how to recognize and appreciate this kind of beauty in a woman. I have to show them, over and over again, mile after mile, until they feel the power of their own legs beneath them and catch the rhythm of their own strides.

Which is why my parents wake my kids early on race-day mornings. It matters to me that my children see me out there, slogging through difficult miles. I want my girls to grow up recognizing the beauty of strength, the exuberance of endurance, and the core confidence residing in a well-tended body and spirit. I want them to be more interested in what they are doing than how they look doing it. I want them to enjoy food that is delicious, feed their bodies with wisdom and intent, and give themselves the freedom to indulge. I want them to compete in healthy ways that honor the cultivation of skill, the expenditure of effort, and the courage of the attempt.

Grace and Bella, will you have any idea how lovely you are when you try?

Recently we ran the Chuy's Hot to Trot Kids K together as a family in Austin, and I ran the 5-K immediately afterward. Post-race, my kids asked me where my medal was. I explained that not everyone gets a medal, so they must have run really well (all kids got a medal, shhh!). As I picked up Grace, she said, "You are so sweaty Mommy, all wet." Luke smiled and said, "Mommy's sweaty 'cause she's fast. And she looks pretty. All clean."

My PRs will never garner attention or generate awards. But when I run, I am 100 percent me--my strengths and weaknesses play out like a cracked-open diary, my emotions often as raw as the chafing from my jog bra. In my ultimate moments of vulnerability, I am twice the woman I was when I thought I was meant to look pretty on the sidelines. Sweaty and smiling, breathless and beautiful: Running helps us all shine. A lesson worth passing along.

you swim like a fish.

surely you are not talking to me? thats what the guy in the next lane said to me today. my workout called for some fast stuff. short though. so i guess i was trying to move quickly. its puzzling for me to hear that for a few reasons. first off - i'm not a good swimmer. take a look at any of my race times or even workouts and you'll understand. im better than i used to be, trust me, but i'm still working out the kinks. the comment also reinforces my "friend" list at the gym. why oh why are the only people that talk to me men over 40? it kind of creeps me out. now i'm not looking for chit chat at the gym at all, but for some reason i have "talk to me" vibes coming across. anyhoo i try to be nice, and maybe thats the problem...perhaps one day i'll wear my wedding dress as a subtle hint! anyway back to the swim. it wasnt particularly memorable for me today, no mind boggling break-throughs, but i feel like with each swim i experiment with my stroke and am learning what feels smooth and what makes me knife thru the water faster. now if only i could keep my head in the game, and actually count laps.. i swear anything more than 100 m is a crap shoot for me. if i've got to do something like a 1500 i've been known to bring 15 pennies to the pool and move them over one by one for each 100 i've completed. hey folks what ever works!
work has yet again taken me to glamorous heights as today i worked on a feminine hygiene brochure. yes cotton, oh cotton, you are good for so many things. i'm trying to quell my excitement as adult incontinence products (so cooly referred to as AI) are right around the corner. gosh darn it i love my job!

sniff sniff

can you smell it? right around the corner...football season and its almost time for kickoff!!

a day in the life..

so in case for some odd reason you'd like to emulate my work out this moring, i thought i'd post the procedure in order to do so.
first put on all of your running clothes. then go jump in a very warm and somewhat dirty lake. make sure every square inch of you is soaking wet and leave any litle critters that stick to you, stuck. bonus points if your shoes actually squish and spurt out water with each step. next take a meat tenderizer and pound on your legs for a while. just as you would pulverize chicken, really hammer those quads. then transplant yourself to the steamy south where they dont even measure the humidity any more, why bother when most people cant even count that high.. now stew in that wonderful state for 2+ hours. good stuff, right!?!? i'm thinking of rewarding myself with a trip to the overly air conditioned movie theater later, where i can chomp on m&m's and forget about life for a while!

raise your hand if you think i'm crazy...

so i was thinking on my ride today that if i were married to me i might want to have the nut house on speed dial.. i was remembering some of the things i have said to bobby this week.. and i'm surprised he is still here...for example these are what i actually remember:
-my feet are expanding sideways..
-can you stop at walmart on your way home form work and pick up the $1200 HD LCD tv i bought for my job
-i think madison (our dog) is depressed (to which he replied- no she's just stupid)
-i've decided my favorite food is cottage cheese
-the reason they won is they scored more points
-if we get divorced what will i get? (he replied the dogs) and i said - and alimony..
-i think we should buy a boat.
-larry the cable guy's wife is pretty hot.
-which color shoe will make me look faster?

anyway- on a training note. its been a good week for me. another big one.. but not feeling as tired as the past few.... some good runs under the belt and a few good rides. (have i professed my love for my bike lately??) i've been paying more attention to form this week, and (duh!) it seems to be helping! the swimming continues to be my nemesis.. we'll see if it still gets the best of me next weekend..

since i dont like coffee i've been searching for alternative caffeine.. tea just doesnt seem to do it for me. maybe i'm immune to its effects.. or who knows.. lipton just isnt cutting it. i found this crystal light energy stuff that is actually pretty good. maybe its all in my head but i think there's something to it.... all those ladies dancing around on TV who drink it seem to be pretty wired...

since my long (did i say long! ha) workout this morning i've had the "ho hum sorta kinda hungry need to eat duldrums.." its like i'm hungry but nothing sounds good. aside from gels and bottles this morning i've eaten - 2 hotdogs (ok they are veggie dogs, and i love them so say all you want - they are GOOD!), yogurt, clif bar(choco mint flavor - spectacular!), ice pop - the ultimate summer treat, though we are down to the end so the flavor chioce is not good, i had orange..., wheat thins, apple + PB, and a salad - with cottage cheese of course! . so maybe thats enough and maybe there are some nutrients in there. better than eating the half of the chocolate cake that is sitting on out counter...

one other thing bouncing around the noggin the last few days is what i've self diagnosed as a fear to go fast. it reared its ugly head with my run last night.. i'm realizing that i dont push myself in my work outs as much as i could (or should) because i'm afraid i cant go that fast. or i'll have to slow down later, or i'm just to tired today, or well something. i dont know. i think its still a confidence thing with me and a learning curve i'm having trouble climbing. i'd like to take someone else's mind set and insert it into my brain so i could download the proper mentality to push those limits. i think part of the issue is i dont know my limits that well. or at all, and am guessing where they are. patience grasshopper..

top 10 reasons JH should add me to her blog roll.. :)

10. a funny thing always happens to me on the way to a race and you’ll laugh till tears come out just hearing about it -- like the time.. or uh actually ok.. so like when... ok so maybe it doesn’t always happen, or maybe I’m still waiting for something funny to happen, but when it does, man its going to be great! And you’ll want to know.
9. I will initiate a new USAT rule that Bawitdaba is played at the start of every triathlon within a 100 mile radius of Chicago. Right after we pay tribute to our country, we will all rock out and get ready to rumble. “My name is KIIIIDDDDDD…”
8. you will learn things by reading my blog. perhaps its how to best align your lawn chairs in the back of your pickup when the party goes on the road (no law in nc against drinking and riding), maybe its a secret recipe for banana bread (good potassium source with chocolate mixed in!), maybe its you shouldn’t listen to funny stories while drinking a diet coke, could be what a dime package is (and no that does not refer to any illegal substances) its FOOTBALL people!
7. HTFU- followed by EDI-TC (easy-does-it training camp) hosted by yours truly, which will include such activities as: core work outs via the belly laughs of watching adam sandler movies, protein intake meals of peanut candies and pizza, hide and seek with wifi connections, pool laps - noodles allowed, s’more making to increase concentration and reaction times (when that sucker catches on fire you better be ready!)
6. I’m a nice girl
5. right now I’m pretty sure that my only faithful reader is my 95 year old pa. And while i relish in the fact that i'm the talk of the retirement home, probably discussed over pudding and games of bridge and many manhattens.... I’m looking to expand my target market into those who didn’t wear “victory” red lipstick or know who Dizzy Gillespie is.
4. it would be an honor to be among the company already listed - that’s the truth. i have a ton of respect for other athletes and the struggles they go thru and the goals they achieve.
3. If there was a race division for melo-dramatic, chocolate hoarding (even my gels are chocolate!), song singing (yes sometimes I sing dumb songs like Micky during races – oh micky you’re so fine..), bad form exhibiting, clinging to my youth women, I would win, no I would rock that every time!
2. I would personally crusade day and night to bring on M&M mars as a major sponsor of USAT and all endurance events across the country. If Kyle Busch can have them why cant we? I would convince them that the annual consumption of their products by triathletes across the country is at least 3x that of the average American. With a finish line full of m&ms can you imagine the sprint to the end???
1. pretty please?

what were you thinking?

remember this stuff? i was reading an article today by the creator (he actually admitted it was his idea!) and he said that all in all it was a good plan, he had done all the research, found the right target market, designed a great ad campaign.. one thing he forgot was to make sure it tasted good. duh!! and i do remember trying this - it was horrid. well a long story short, that guy went back to the drawing board and now owns YUM! poster child for "if at first you dont succeed..."

anyway nice slow day in the pool for me today. i almost didnt know what to do with myself when i was home and done for the day at 6 pm. that is an odd phenomenon for me. do i watch the news? do i wash some clothes? do i take the girls for a walk? survey says: D. all of the above. ... so this is what normal people do after work.. hmmmm...

balance - or more appropriately titled: my name is kari and i'm addicted..

so last night we went to the durham bulls game. i think we only stayed for about 6 innings since we got there late and left before it was over. no shortage of small children doing what small children do - yell the same 4 words over and over, spill things, make numerous trips to the bathroom, yell for the mascot to come over...

i do find it interesting to see what songs the players pick to play over the loudspeaker when they are up to bat. always a bad a$$ bumpin' song you might hear coming out of a pimped out ride, that you think has to belong to a large black man who has not only memorized but lived the lyrics... but alas its usually a small white guy coming up, guess they are trying to prove something. i thought about what song i would play and its a toss up between jack johnson's flake and foo fighters all my life. though i would also like to do something like madonna's "express yourself" just to make everyone say "huh?" figure that one out!

anyway no food purchases at the ball park, every time i go i get a soft pretzel which i love,but here they are always not hot and not soft.. so a stop at harris teeter was made on the way home and cookie cake purchased. we always get the one with the most icing, though now they actually sell tubs of the stuff. .but thats a bit much right? we got the one that said congratulations on it. we always pick the one with the most icing.. our best one yet was a "hats off the the graduate" comeplete with iced hat and diplma. yes!!! easter and spring are the best times as flowers us up large quantities of icing. yes there is an art to choosing your cake! i do eat cookie cakes, and brownies and ice cream. its all about balance and i do believe quality of life. i'm giving it my all for triathlon right now but there has to be room for the other stuff too. and darn they are good!!!!

tunnel vision

so i've realized that i need to change my thinking both going into workouts and when i'm in the midst.. its overwhelming for me to look at a week and think - oh geez i have to do all that in the span of seven days? and sometimes even breaking it down to just what my daily workout is can lead to a few heart palpitations.. so what i'm trying to do is put on the blinders. take it one day at a time, one workout at a time, even one set at a time. when its only the next 6 minutes i need to get thru, i can trick my self in to going harder if thats all i have to do. no room to even entertain thoughts of the pending 2 hr ride or even the next set of 6 minutes just looming ahead. being in that one moment and doing the best that i can for just that time. in the past when i have gotten ahead of myself i've turned on the conservation button and probably not given a good effort in order to save up for the work ahead. but i'm finding that its not a good way to go. nor is it benefiting me. if i want to get better at this i'm going to have to learn to push from start to end. so if it takes me faking a bit of amnesia about the future... i'm ready.

hierarchy

i do believe this is not to far from the truth for some!

a random smattering

so a few odd thoughts that needed to come out..

on my run/ride on sunday i saw exactly 6 dead animals on the road. 3 rats, 1 frog, 1 squirrel and 1 unidentified remain.. was a bit reminiscent of the Apocalypse.. reminded me of an incident in college.. the rats did.. freshman year. dorm life. my RA was a not nice girl who was especially not nice to the guys on the hall below us. anyway one early morning i awake to screaming.. turns out they (in all their maturity) had pinned a dead rat by its tail to the bulletin board on her door.

just because something costs more and is in a nicer package doesnt mean its better. case in point the sourdough bread i bought at whole foods the other day. gorgeous label, wonderful display case, high price tag, --- blah! honestly the bread at wal mart is like a million times better. long live capitalism.. or at least off shore sourcing.. ha ha

my dogs lead the best life. try and beat it! they have their own bed room. yes really, sleep all of the night and then some of the day, have a mostly green yard they can frolic in when ever they please, have a plethora of birds, squirrels and rabbits to chase, food at all hours, a treat for doing nothing more than just walking in from outside, more belly rubs than a Buddha, walks around the neighborhood to just see whats up, they puke on expensive rugs that we have to replace and because there are 2 of them we are never sure which one it was, and they are blessed with good looks.

TV shows have really gone off the deep end. i cant even watch. it is quite possible they have explored and now televise every possible facet of reality that our own lives have truly become irrelevant. there is a dog grooming contest, too many chef shows to count, COPS is still on, every celebrity from kathy griffen to now denise richards has their own show, you can make over your home, your self, your best friend, if you have one iota of talent in your left pinky then surely you have thought to enter "the next best ______" or "america's newest ____" its all so terrible. if you need love, fame or fortune there is surely some producer out there who will exploit the heck out of you to make it happen.. ugh..

training and working is tough. a few rough days in the office and then a few long hours on the circuit will really ruffle your feathers a bit and your body definitely has a point when enough is enough and you start to falter. i'm learning to balance the two and to, even in the times of being tired, find that third gear and go. its definitely a battle sometimes.

waddle on friends (love that out of runner's world!)

bonk and beautiful

start of the ride.. with tons of people!!!

so today was the firecracker group ride. with it i learned two important lessons. the first was a reminder that i hate group rides when there are more than say 5 people. its like trying to leave a nascar event after the checkered flag - you have to dodge a trillion people who are not paying attention to where they are going, they are rolling along at all different speeds and will stop suddenly for no apparent reason. blah! the crowd did thin out about 20 miles into the ride, but that first hour was brutal enough to effect the whole ride. hence my second lesson - DRINK. drink often and early. i was spending so much of my efforts to not crash that i was not comfortable to sip- and probably super tense using up energy.. ugh! i really paid for it the last 1.5 hrs of my ride as even after filling both my bottles at the last stop i was empty and hurting by the three hr mark. the 97 degree temps and humidity didnt help either, but today was one day when i had to cut my ride short and just get home. my legs were not cooperating. i had lost all of the speed and drive i had the first 2 hours. it was a bonk.

sooo after what i consider a partially good ride (due to lessons learned at at least some good miles) i think i needed to make up with something positive and since we never had spring cleaning, we had summer holiday day off cleaning. woo! makes you feel good to see your floor again, and get all the dog hair from out of the corners. we even re-arranged some furniture. yes it was a very productive after noon.

very fitting was a trip to dairy queen to reward our efforts. who knew the inside of that place was so posh.. the last time i was in a dairy queen i didnt want to stay long but was forced to as i was stuck to the booth.. anyway.. now bobby is napping on the couch, guess his ride plus his forced housekeeping tired him out.

its official

the uniform has arrived. its actually not too bad looking and fits well. both of which i was a bit concerned about.. also got a few cool freebies including a hat that bobby has already claimed.. and a new water bottle. which brings our household total up to about 35. some women collect shoes, i get excited if i get a new bottle... call me crazy.. but now the reality has hit.. its funny, i know exactly how many days away the race is thanks to NBC and their constant reminders about the olympics starting - seeing that my race is 2 days after that. i almost feel like they are talking to me as well as the olympic athletes.. (hey i can dream!)

smokey is excited for the trials as well. something i learned 4 years ago in richmond.. she is a tv watcher. no joke. her favorite programs include meercats, the kitty litter commercial with the blood hound dog (no kidding. she comes running when that music starts), sci fi movies, and of course swimming. i'm not sure what it is about swimming but she is mezmerized. she follows the swimmers across the screen. i know its a case of everyone thinks their dog is the cutest.. but...

in the midst of my biggest training week ever so we'll see how i survive come sunday when its finished! bobby and i are doing the firecracker ride tomorrow am. its a HUGE annual group ride - i think last year they had about 800 riders. my goal is to get in with the front riders for a while and just hang on for at least 1/2 of the ride. seeing as i wont know where i am until that point its not just work out related but survival as well... i'm not that great at following the cue sheets they give you as i'm always looking for the wrong road. so we'll see how the 100k goes..

its been challenging balancing a full time job with the increase in training. thankfully my job is not overly stressful (as most of you know from the millions of emails i send out daily) and i've been able to work around travel.. but i do envy those who work from home or have flexible hours.. did a run then a ride on the trainer to night. caught up on my secret TV show i like to watch - days of our lives. i know possibly the worst thing on tv right now - or ever. bad acting, bad story lines, but just a guilty pleasure.. i mean the deceit, the manipulation, the love fiascos, the attempt to create a cool looking hip dance club on tv - or most recently the fitness club where people are pretending to work out.. so good.

but i do love what i'm doing, otherwise i dont think i could get myself out there everyday.

happy 4th!